Alright so I've missed quite a few opportunities to blog. For instance, the season finale of Nashville Star (which had JEWEL as a judge this year - WTF?!) Then there was the announcement that Trailer Park Swift would be doing a Crossroads on CMT with none other than Def Leppard. I repeat. WTF!?
But this. This one can't be swept under the rug. I remember the days when country music awards shows, hell ANY music award shows, were coveted and everyone dressed up like they were going to visit the Queen. Now it's 3 hours of barely dressed performances of pop stars using country as their gateway into music. They wouldn't know a real country music start like Merle Haggard or George Jones if they walked up smacked them in their little ignorant faces! It just infuriates me.
The show started with Sir Brad Paisley schooling Keith Urban in their new duet "Start a Band". It's the closest that Keith Urban has come to a country song in a looonnnnng time. Don't get me wrong, he's talented. But he ain't country. He used to be. You should look up his old band 'The Ranch', you won't believe it's the same guy.
Then stupid smug arrogant ass Carrie "Scary" Underwood came out to insert her "cute little banter" with Brad Paisley as co-host. Ugh. Give me a break! I took some personal humor in the fact that you could see her slip through her dress when she walked out on stage the first time. Oh well - what do you expect? I'm passionate!
There was Kelly Pickler's performance that was just ok except for her S&M 'I want to live at the Playboy mansion' black leather mini dress with knee high boots outfit. Again, I just want to know why is this music on country radio!! Her first few songs were tolerable....but this new one just needs to find Ryan Seacrest and make itself at home with him and his weekly Top 40 countdown.
Anyway, let's move on to my next (and biggest) soapbox, shall we? Taylor "Trailer" Swift. There is not enough blog space in the world for me to fully explain how much I loathe her existence in country music. On a pop channel, fine. She'd be no worse than Ashlee Simpson or Avril Levigne. But COUNTRY!? Are you SERIOUS?! Her performance tonight was like a high school musical! I'm not talking about the Zac Efron phenomenon......I'm talking about some back woods middle school where the janitor is the chorus teacher. At one point she even smacked her microphone into the side of the "balcony" she was standing on.
She then walked down the steps past the working FOUNTAIN on stage to join the dancers waltzing on stage to her dumbass song. Then the lights went down, everyone crowded around her and, you guessed it.....ripped her dress off of her to reveal a white wedding gown looking dress that was hidden underneath the purple ugly 'my cousin who hates me made me wear this' bridesmaid dress. Disgusting.
And in a "one-two punch" of ridiculousness, Mr. Bob Ritchie aka "KID ROCK" followed her with a live performance of his catchy little diddy 'All Summer Long'. To quote my BFF Kellie, it looked like he mugged Ruben Studdard for his shirt. We won't even begin to touch on how moronic that song is. I've always been a huge fan of his but this song is over the line.
Rodney Atkins performed, and since I love him, I have no negative criticisms.
At some point Rascall Farts won for the best something that they don't deserve. It was vomitacious.
Kenny Chesney won Entertainer of the Year, which I guess is alright. I was pulling for Sugarland but whatever. The problem I have though is that SHITNIA TWAIN (and her new boobs) PRESENTED THE AWARD!!! Before there was Trailer Swift, there was Shitnia Twain that kept me up at night. Ugh. And as with Trailer Swift, there will never EVER be enough words, paper, or blog server space for me to express my feelings on HER!
Alright, I'll admit it. It wasn't all crap. There were actually a few noteworthy moments of the night:
* Scary Underwood was introduced by the wife of a fallen US Soldier who gave his life for our country in Afghanistan. The crowd stood and applauded her and her husband and it was beautiful. God Bless our men and women in uniform. Not just the day after Veteran's Day but EVERY DAY!
* Scary Underwood won for Female Vocalist of the Year BUT she beat out Taylor Swift so that's awesome! And let's face it, she's an a-hole, but she can sing. I can't deny that.
* Brad Paisley played a gorgeous, short but VERY sweet, acoustic tribute to the late Jerry Reed who we lost earlier this year.
* Vince Gill read out the latest inductees into the Country Music Hall of Fame and they all actually deserved to be there. Even the Statler Brothers, God love 'em.
* Male Vocalist of the Year was actually a contest this year. The nominees were all totally qualified to be there, in my humble opinion. Then, when Brad Paisley won, he ran out from backstage, past Reese Witherspoon with his award to hug Keith Urban....JUST KIDDING....he ran out to hug and kiss his wife and then knelt down to smooch her little pregnant belly. So sweet!
So that's it. My way long and probably wayyyyy too wordy commentary on the 2008 Country Music Awards.
MacAvoy. Out.
But this. This one can't be swept under the rug. I remember the days when country music awards shows, hell ANY music award shows, were coveted and everyone dressed up like they were going to visit the Queen. Now it's 3 hours of barely dressed performances of pop stars using country as their gateway into music. They wouldn't know a real country music start like Merle Haggard or George Jones if they walked up smacked them in their little ignorant faces! It just infuriates me.
The show started with Sir Brad Paisley schooling Keith Urban in their new duet "Start a Band". It's the closest that Keith Urban has come to a country song in a looonnnnng time. Don't get me wrong, he's talented. But he ain't country. He used to be. You should look up his old band 'The Ranch', you won't believe it's the same guy.
Then stupid smug arrogant ass Carrie "Scary" Underwood came out to insert her "cute little banter" with Brad Paisley as co-host. Ugh. Give me a break! I took some personal humor in the fact that you could see her slip through her dress when she walked out on stage the first time. Oh well - what do you expect? I'm passionate!
There was Kelly Pickler's performance that was just ok except for her S&M 'I want to live at the Playboy mansion' black leather mini dress with knee high boots outfit. Again, I just want to know why is this music on country radio!! Her first few songs were tolerable....but this new one just needs to find Ryan Seacrest and make itself at home with him and his weekly Top 40 countdown.
Anyway, let's move on to my next (and biggest) soapbox, shall we? Taylor "Trailer" Swift. There is not enough blog space in the world for me to fully explain how much I loathe her existence in country music. On a pop channel, fine. She'd be no worse than Ashlee Simpson or Avril Levigne. But COUNTRY!? Are you SERIOUS?! Her performance tonight was like a high school musical! I'm not talking about the Zac Efron phenomenon......I'm talking about some back woods middle school where the janitor is the chorus teacher. At one point she even smacked her microphone into the side of the "balcony" she was standing on.
She then walked down the steps past the working FOUNTAIN on stage to join the dancers waltzing on stage to her dumbass song. Then the lights went down, everyone crowded around her and, you guessed it.....ripped her dress off of her to reveal a white wedding gown looking dress that was hidden underneath the purple ugly 'my cousin who hates me made me wear this' bridesmaid dress. Disgusting.
And in a "one-two punch" of ridiculousness, Mr. Bob Ritchie aka "KID ROCK" followed her with a live performance of his catchy little diddy 'All Summer Long'. To quote my BFF Kellie, it looked like he mugged Ruben Studdard for his shirt. We won't even begin to touch on how moronic that song is. I've always been a huge fan of his but this song is over the line.
Rodney Atkins performed, and since I love him, I have no negative criticisms.
At some point Rascall Farts won for the best something that they don't deserve. It was vomitacious.
Kenny Chesney won Entertainer of the Year, which I guess is alright. I was pulling for Sugarland but whatever. The problem I have though is that SHITNIA TWAIN (and her new boobs) PRESENTED THE AWARD!!! Before there was Trailer Swift, there was Shitnia Twain that kept me up at night. Ugh. And as with Trailer Swift, there will never EVER be enough words, paper, or blog server space for me to express my feelings on HER!
Alright, I'll admit it. It wasn't all crap. There were actually a few noteworthy moments of the night:
* Scary Underwood was introduced by the wife of a fallen US Soldier who gave his life for our country in Afghanistan. The crowd stood and applauded her and her husband and it was beautiful. God Bless our men and women in uniform. Not just the day after Veteran's Day but EVERY DAY!
* Scary Underwood won for Female Vocalist of the Year BUT she beat out Taylor Swift so that's awesome! And let's face it, she's an a-hole, but she can sing. I can't deny that.
* Brad Paisley played a gorgeous, short but VERY sweet, acoustic tribute to the late Jerry Reed who we lost earlier this year.
* Vince Gill read out the latest inductees into the Country Music Hall of Fame and they all actually deserved to be there. Even the Statler Brothers, God love 'em.
* Male Vocalist of the Year was actually a contest this year. The nominees were all totally qualified to be there, in my humble opinion. Then, when Brad Paisley won, he ran out from backstage, past Reese Witherspoon with his award to hug Keith Urban....JUST KIDDING....he ran out to hug and kiss his wife and then knelt down to smooch her little pregnant belly. So sweet!
So that's it. My way long and probably wayyyyy too wordy commentary on the 2008 Country Music Awards.
MacAvoy. Out.
